In a few days’ time Father Christmas needs to defy all the flight restrictions currently piling up for the country and set out on a massive journey to deliver every child their well-deserved gifts. This mammoth task is only possible with the help of his wonderful team of reindeer. Naturally many children wish to reward this generosity with gifts of their own in the form of a mince pie for Santa and a carrot for the reindeer. Unfortunately, all this extra nutrition has one unavoidable problem. Reindeer poo. Reindeer need to make regular deposits of their own if they are not to miss their deadline. Sadly, Santa hasn’t the time to ‘bag and bin it’.
If you are lucky enough to wake up on Christmas Day with an extra present, what are you to do with it? Well this has been worrying me for quite some time so I decided I should be guided by the science and set up an experiment of my own.
Luckily, I live close to a reindeer hotel where they were only too pleased for me to relieve them of some of this surplus poo. This was carefully mixed with twice the volume of wood chips and covered with bubble-wrap to form its very own snug and warm support bubble. I’d heard that ventilation was also important so fresh air was piped at regular intervals throughout the pile. Nothing more to be done. I just needed to let Nature take its course.
Slowly but surely things started to stir. Next day the temperature had risen 3 degrees and was no longer a cool 10°C. The R factor must have been well over 1 as the heap continued to heat up. Growth was exponential. Today it is over 40°C and still rising.
The scientists are telling me that this will not continue for ever. The poo will get converted into something wonderful in just a few weeks. Meanwhile I have a free source of heat to warm the water source I trickle in constantly to keep everything sweet. Next spring, I can look forward to spreading a little joy around my garden. All the plants should love it and in the New Year I can enjoy a harvest of fresh and healthy vegetables. Isn’t Nature wonderful.
Merry Christmas everyone!